“Oye, Culona, check out my back, I think there’s a cyst or something back there I need your opinion on.” My Abuelito, El Exagerado, stood before me, fresh out of the shower, smelling like a rose. (Literally. He used my favorite rose soap.) He was wearing a long t-shirt and, one would assume, some underwear. “Mira, chica!” he insisted as he turned his back to me to facilitate the examination.
I leaned down and lifted up the bottom of his shirt. Nothing but bare, 81-year-old ass crack staring back at me.
El Exagerado, pleased with himself, erupted into a hearty laugh.
Sheesh. What an amateur my grandfather is! If it were my brother that’d done that, he would have topped it off with a fart to my face.
That’s right, the family is here for the holidays. Let the merry making begin!